Darren Heideman & Andrew Mantynen
Song Lyrics by:
[The Flynn-Fletcher Home-The Backyard-Phineas and Ferb stand outside, enjoying the winter weather.]
Phineas: Ah...feel that chilly air. I can feel Jack Frost nipping at my nose already.
[It's then Jack Frost is shown in the corner of the tree in the backyard.]
Jack Frost: That's the biggest nose I ever nipped, if I do say so myself. (ducks away)
Phineas: Got any wintertime ideas, Ferb?
[Ferb shows Phineas a list.]
Phineas: Looks like we know what we're doing today.
Candace: (on phone) So, if you want, we could go sledding. I know a great hill.
Stacy: (on other end) Okay. I'll be right over and we can get Jenny.
Candace: See ya then, Stace. (She hangs up.)
[Later, Candace is in her winter outfit from the Christmas episode and has her toboggan when she greets Stacy.]
Stacy: Hey, Candace. What do you think of my new snow jacket?
[Stacy is wearing a huge puffy jacket that makes her look big and round.]
Candace: Uh, no offense, Stace, but you look like a big blue marshmallow.
[Stacy frowns but is not insulted.]
Stacy: Well, whatever. It's the warmest coat I had and I just wanted to be safe.
Candace: Come on. Let's go get Jenny.
[The two depart, not noticing Phineas and Ferb ice fish in a makeshift pond the size of an average kiddy pool.]
Phineas: Nothing biting today.
[Ferb feels a tug and pulls in a big fish, a sturgeon.]
Phineas: Looks like that will be the catch of the day.
[It's then Isabella, Buford and Baljeet, and Irving enter the yard.]
Isabella: Hey, guys. Whatcha-
Irving: -doin! I know what you're gonna say! You say it every time!
[Isabella folds her arms and gives Irving the coldest icy stare she's ever given anyone.]
Phineas: Ferb and I were just trying to decide what to do next, but since you're all here, I've got jus the thing. Together we can make one giant igloo and then each decorate a room.
Baljeet: It will be like we're living in the arctic. How do people even survive there?
Phineas: Get some snow packing, patch it up, and you got yourself a sturdy ice house.
[Meanwhile, Candace and Stacy have almost reached Jenny's house. Candace is the first to the front step, with Stacy still getting to the end of the sidewalk.]
Candace: Come on, Stacy!
Stacy: Hold on! I'm getting there! (gets to front step) Okay, I'm ready.
[Candace rings the doorbell and Jenny appears wearing her winter outfit of a yellow coat and brown gloves, orange and pink pants, yellow boots and white earmuffs.]
Jenny: Hey, guys.
Candace: Ready, Jenny?
Jenny: Ready, willing, and able!
Stacy: Okay! Let's go!
[The girls head off towards the hill. Candace is the first to the top.]
Candace: This is gonna be the best snow ride ever! Right, girls?
[There's no response from Stacy.]
Jenny: Where's Stacy?
[Candace and Jenny turn to find Stacy lagging behind, though she trudges along to catch up.]
Candace: Stacy, move it!
Stacy: I'm trying; this coat was made for warmth, not mobility. (She stumbles, almost falling into a pile of snow) It's comfy, but also clumsy.
[Meanwhile back at the Flynn-Fletcher Home, the kids have finished with the giant igloo in the backyard.]
Phineas: Well, there it is, a fine igloo that would make Intuits jealous.
Buford: Time to kick back, Alaskan style.
[The kids go into their igloos and find them cozy; Phineas and Ferb have a pinball machine in theirs; Baljeet made his feel like home with his studies; Isabella has pictures of Phineas in hers; Buford has a ton of pictures of pandas in his.]
[Irving's room looks normal.]
Irving: You know, I probably should have thought of this ahead of time.
Baljeet: Well, that certainly took shorter time than I expected. What now?
Phineas: We did have an idea for a rapid fire snowball cannon, but Ferb's got a better one.
Ferb: Candace has gone sledding with Stacy and Jenny, so what about a sledding race?
[At the hill, the girls are ready to sled. Candace takes the front spot, Stacy slumps into the middle, and Jenny brings up the rear. They slide the toboggan back and forth to get ready.]
Candace: Here we go. Hang on tight.
[They start sledding down the hill.]
Candace: Woo-hoo! This is just like the good old days!
[The girls reach the bottom of the hill and make several more runs, until they notice Phineas and Ferb and their friends atop the hill. Phineas and Ferb have their own sleds, Isabella carries an inner tube, Buford and Irving each have a personal toboggan, and Baljeet has a saucer sled.]
Phineas: Hey, Candace, care for a race?
Candace: A race? You're kidding, right?
Phineas: Not at all.
Candace: You know what, thanks but no thanks.
Stacy: Why shouldn't we?
Jenny: Yeah, why?
Candace: My brothers should be busted, not joined, that's why.
Buford: You'd just lose anyway.
[Everything goes still and Candace narrows her eyes.]
Candace: Bring it on. We'll take on all of you.
[Everyone gets ready for the race, lining up at the top of the hill.]
Phineas: The rules are simple; first one to the bottom wins. Ready
[Everyone slides down, with Buford taking the early lead, followed by Isabella, Baljeet, Candace, Stacy, and Jenny, Ferb, Phineas, and Irving taking last place.]
[Candace, Stacy, and Jenny close the gap and overtake Baljeet and Isabella, closing in on Buford and the lead.]
Jenny & Stacy: Wheee! (pause) Uh-oh.
[While the kids take a path marked with a sign reading "Gentle Sloping Path", Candace misses the turn and starts down a path marked with a sign that reads "You Really Should've Gone Down The Other One."]
[The toboggan speeds down the rugged, uneven, and obstacle laden trail.]
[Candace steers to the right, missing the trees.]
[Candace steers to the left, missing the rocks. However the toboggan nears precariously to the edge of a ledge.]
Jenny: Not so close to the ledge!
[Candace steers away from the ledge.]
Stacy: Old guy!
[The old guy from the Chinese restaurant from "Magic Carpet Ride" dives out of the way and rolls down into the ditch.]
Old Guy: I'm okay. (pause) Is this where I live?
[The girls continue speeding down and head right for a farm house. At their current speed, they smash cleanly through one wall, pass by a farmer and his wife, and then smash cleanly through the second wall.]
Farmer: What was that?
Farmer's Wife: Three teenage girls on a toboggan.
Farmer: Well, as long as they don't go near the chickens.
[The toboggan streaks towards the chicken coop, where Agent C slips on his fedora is about to enter a secret chute. Seeing the oncoming toboggan, he "bakaws" in surprise and dives down the chute. The toboggan passes by, sending snow flying and covering the other chickens.]
[Candace gets control of the toboggan at last and turns to look back and smile at Stacy and Jenny. However, their eyes are wide in fear and they both point.]
Stacy & Jenny: PLOW!!!
[Candace looks to see a snow plow coming directly at them, honking its horn. She leans to the left, trying to change course. The toboggan does so, but hits a pile of snow which acts as a ramp and is sent flying. Candace, Stacy, and Jenny are all thrown off and go soaring through the air.]
[The girls disappear off screen momentarily and there are three muffled thumps heard. In a snow bank, there is a Candace shaped hole. Candace crawls out as Jenny's head pops out of the snow bank.]
Candace: Oh, that was a close one. You okay, Jenny?
Jenny: I'm fine. Boy, what a rough landing. Reminds me of that old comic strip about the kid and his stuffed tiger.
Candace: How about you, Stacy? (She gets no answer.) Stacy?
Stacy: Over here!
[Candace and Jenny see Stacy lying atop another part of the snow bank. She struggles, but cannot move.]
Stacy: Help, I can't get up!
Candace: Hang on, Stacy, we got you.
[Candace and Jenny get hold of Stacy's arms and pull her up.]
Jenny: Good thing you that extra padding.
[Stacy brushes herself off.]
Stacy: Thanks, girls. Man, this jacket is causing nothing but trouble. I mean, look at me! It's warm and comfy, but it's hard to move and get up in it and it makes me look fat!
Candace: Come on, Stace. We're not mad at you. You like it, you wear it.
Jenny: Yeah. Don't feel bad about it.
Stacy: (smiling) Yeah. I think it's fun wearing this thing. It makes me feel safe and warm. I'll wear it until winter's over.
[A song cue starts with the tune of 1950s rock and roll music. Montage: Stacy is moving to the beat of her big puffy coat and enjoying it.]
Lead Singer: Oh, there's a girl who's wearing a coat
It's extra soft and it makes her stay afloat
She may look wide in that winter wear
But it's a good choice that she's got there
She's a big puffy girl
Backup Singers: Big Puffy Girl
Lead Singer: Her fluffy soft armor makes her proud
She's the biggest to stick out in the crowd
She'll keep herself and you warm with you under
The girl makes the noise of a puffy thunder
She's a...BIG puffy girl
Backup Singers: Big Puffy Girl
Lead Singer: She may have trouble moving
But she doesn't mind
She's one puffy mama
Shaking her coated behind
[Stacy shakes her booty.]
Lead Singer: She's got nothing to have lost
She's protected from the frost
It's her new and favorite jacket
And for it we make a racket
She's a big, big puffy girl
Backup Singers: Big Puffy Girl
Lead Singer: She's a big puffy girl
[Stacy ends the montage with the lead singer sticking a hose into the back of Stacy's jacket and then switching on a machine. Stacy's coat expands until it fills the entire screen. A downward angle shows Stacy from above inside her now massive jacket.]
[Back to reality. The girls all laugh uncontrollably.]
Candace: Come on, let's get back to my house.
[As the girls walk back, a truck passes by them, its cargo the very same giant igloo the kids made.]
Driver: It was nice of those kids to give us this igloo.
[The Flynn-Fletcher Home-Candace, Stacy, and Jenny arrive at the house. They enter the kitchen, finding Phineas and Ferb and their friends already there, enjoying drinks and snacks.]
Linda: There you are, girls. The boys said they lost track of you.
Candace: Yeah, we took a detour.
Linda: You girls look like you could use some hot cocoa and fresh from the oven snickerdoodles.
Stacy & Jenny: Thanks, Mrs. Flynn-Fletcher.
[The girls each grab a cup and a cookie.]
Linda: Nice jacket, Stacy.
Stacy: Thanks. It's funny, I'm like a marshmallow drinking cocoa with marshmallows.
[Everyone laughs and a few notes from the song plays again.]
Lead Singer: She's a big puffy girl